| Tuesday, November 07, 2006 |
| 12 days |
I used to think that SPM was my greatest achievement, academic wise, due to the fact that I was not fully prepared, studied like never before, last minute, and had low expectations. Form 6 and STPM is a whole new level, climbing 2 steps foward up the stairs instead of 1, in shorter space of time. Yet here am I again, with this familiar feeling of quandry, but with the awareness in mind that STPM is never the same as SPM.
The fact of the matter is, STPM is one of the top 5 toughest exams in the world, at this level. Is it a step to far for me? I know that at this crucial moment I shouldn't be having any self doubts. Can I trust my instincts that history is on my side? To be honest, I have plenty to prove. Based on my SPM results, the weight of expectation is inevitably fixed on me. I hate pressures; and I hate expectations. But deep inside me I have the desire to prove everyone wrong. Every single person who wrote me off and to make them eat their own words. Sigh.. If only it's that simple.
I have never considered form 6 as my first choice and in fact, it was way down at the bottom of my list of choices. Probably my negativity doused my motivation to push harder at times. There were many occasions I felt like quitting, but I felt reluctant to let my parents down, and to let Carrie down.
Its 3am in the morning, I've completed a few sets of Bio Objective... Lack of sleep is probably why I'm writing this.
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posted by Mr. Bak @ 11:07 AM  |
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